This totally cracked me up. It’s a quote from the weekly pregnancy e-mail update I get.
Pregnancy survival skill: How to get out of a soft chair
Put your feet flat on the floor and bend from the hips. Push on the armrests with your hands! Use your stomach muscles. If upward motion is still elusive, pick up your magazine and yell for more mint-chip ice cream. (Standing up is totally overrated anyway.)
Recent Incoming LinksMay the Lord in wondrous mercy,
Cause your 'little plant' to grow,
With the 'lillies' of his raising
Where His own pure waters flow.
As a 'little plant' before Him,
May the tender sapling shoot,
And in His appointed season,
Bear the Lord enduring fruit.
Train them by the Holy precepts,
With a dresser's tender care;
Looking to the Lord for guidance,
He is true; and answers prayer.
Watch the 'little shoots' of nature,
And in pruning careful be,
For the knife unwisely wielded,
Often spoils the finest tree.
Prayer will keep the 'weeds' from
gaining
Strength in your domestic soil.
Prayer will help you in attaining
Those fond hopes that none can foil.
Prayer will keep the 'little foxes';
O how watchful you should be!
For they often do such damage
To the little 'growing tree.'
May our gracious God in mercy,
Early save the little one;
And to the dear praying parents,
Wisdom give through His dear Son.
Author Unknown
Funny! I’ll have to remember that one.